Friday, April 27, 2007


That is, Age-Related Attention Deficit Disorder

This is how it manifests:

I decide to water my garden.

As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide
my car needs washing.

As I start toward the garage, I notice that there is mail on the porch
table that I brought up from the mailbox earlier.

I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.

I lay my car keys down on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage
can under the table, and notice the can is full.

So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage

But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out
the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first.

I take my checkbook off the table, and see that there is only one check

My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to
my desk where I find the can of Coke that I had been drinking.

I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the Coke aside
so that I don't accidentally knock it over.

I realize the Coke is getting warm, and I decide I should put it in the
refrigerator to keep it cold.

As I head toward the kitchen with the Coke, a vase of flowers on the
counter catches my eye--they need to be watered.

I set the Coke down on the counter, and I discover my reading glasses
that I've been searching for all morning.

I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going to
water the flowers.

I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water
and suddenly I spot the TV remote.

Someone left it on the kitchen table and I realize that tonight when we
go to watch TV, I will be looking for the remote, but I won't remember that
it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where
it belongs, but first I'll water the flowers.

I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spills on the

So, I set the remote back down on the table, get some towels and wipe up
the spill.

Then I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day:

The driveway is flooded

The car isn't washed,

The bills aren't paid,

There is a warm can of Coke sitting on the counter,

There is still only one check in my check book,

I can't find the remote,

I can't find my glasses,

And I don't remember what I did with the car keys.

Then when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I'm really
baffled because I know I was busy all day long, and I'm really tired.

I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for
it, but first I'll check my e-mail.

(Stolen from the internet, of all places.)

Thursday, April 26, 2007

No New Posts

In looking at my index, I've noticed three draft, unfinished or censored posts in the last week. Hmmm...

Sunday, April 22, 2007

A Frog and Toad Story

"Come help me! One of my ex-boyfriends is on my doorstep trying to get in," she exclaimed.

"No, no," I replied, "that's a harmless toad, not a frog."

"Oh, good," she replied, "I was worried there for a minute."

As you can see, the toad went away very disappointed, nearly in tears, that she wouldn't let him in.

"I'm holding out for the frog, aka Prince Charming, you know," she told him, and with a swish of the broom, sent him off to hide under the car.

The End.