I think this is because my love language is Acts of Service:
Acts of ServiceSo if it is so natural for me to say yes, why do I so often feel taken advantage of? I crave to be appreciated, and to hear that the recipient of my service really understands what I've done and really is grateful. I may intellectually know that they are happy for my help, but yet I want to hear them carefully and specifically acknowledge my work and thank me.
Can vacuuming the floors really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most want to hear: “Let me do that for you.” Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter
Jesus might have noticed the same thing with the people he helped, but, being sinless, he didn't let it bother him :-) The ten lepers personally asked for help, and Jesus quickly and gladly gave it. But only one recipient of healing expressed his gratitude:
11 Now on his way to Jerusalem, Jesus traveled along the border between Samaria and Galilee. 12 As he was going into a village, ten men who had leprosy met him. They stood at a distance 13 and called out in a loud voice, "Jesus, Master, have pity on us!" 14 When he saw them, he said, "Go, show yourselves to the priests." And as they went, they were cleansed. 15 One of them, when he saw he was healed, came back, praising God in a loud voice. 16 He threw himself at Jesus' feet and thanked him--and he was a Samaritan. 17 Jesus asked, "Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine? 18 Was no one found to return and give praise to God except this foreigner?" 19 Then he said to him, "Rise and go; your faith has made you well."
Luke 17:11-19 NIV
So, if Jesus only got one-tenth of the thanks that he deserved, perhaps I shouldn't expect more.
2 comments:
I don't want to be presumptuous, and I certainly agree with much of what you have written. I read an excellent book recently called "When People Are Big and God is Small" which kind of talked about this tendency to commit (and sometimes overcommit) when people ask for things (and also that under-appreciated feeling). You might give it a look:
http://www.amazon.com/When-People-Are-Big-Small/dp/0875526004
Again, not trying to be presumptuous. I just couldn't help but think of myself when I read you post, and Ed Welch's book showed me some things about myself which I would have otherwise missed.
Thank you, Peter, for your comment. You're not being presumptuous--I understand the concept of thinking too much of oneself because, sadly, I'm good at it. And I also admit to not be thankful enough myself for what others do for me.
I may try to check out your recommendation.
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