I'm on vacation now, so my mind is not thinking about work. I'm at my mom's house, in a setting that is reminding me that sometimes I'm not the mom--sometimes I'm the child. At the same time, I have 2 out of 3 of my almost-grown children here with me. Further, my heart is sad because this is the first Christmas without my grandmother. And on top of all of that, tomorrow I will have been married for 29 years. So I'm thinking about family today.
I am so lucky (though I know believers really shouldn't use that word) to have a happy marriage. So many people of my age have married and divorced, some more than once. And if we are to believe the statistics, the chances of my three children all having happy marriages are not good.
I was 22 years old when I got married. Two of my children are already older than that.
One of my kids does have a significant other and I think is heading toward marriage in the not-too-distant future. Odd thing about that is that, although this child is the most social and socially well-adjusted of all my kids, this is his first ever real girlfriend. He did like a certain girl as a teenager, but she never really reciprocated, though they were always close friends and remain so today. She broke his heart, but he hid it well until years later he finally told me how much he had liked her and how badly he hurt when she rejected him. Sigh. There are some obstacles to overcome with his current relationship, but he is madly in love, and has a can-do attitude about life, so he will actively pursue her without doubt and without hesitation until she says either "yes" or "no."
Another one of my kids has "always" had a significant other, though at this present moment he doesn't. He has the kind of personality that girls find attractive--extremely self-confident, quiet, and capable of doing just about anything. He has had at least three different girlfriends in his short life and I liked all three of them. I know he wants to get married some day, but he is choosing a life of lots of education, so maybe it is good that he isn't dating anyone now so he can pursue his education singlemindedly for a little while.
The last of my children really wants to get married and is now at the point in her life where she could be free to marry. She has had two boyfriends and a number of other "crushes" during her life, but no current prospects. She is at that stage in life where she is nearly finished with her education and her nesting instincts are kicking in. I feel kind of sorry for her, because in our society it seems like it really isn't OK for a young woman to feel that way. Society is telling her to be strong, get a job, make money, be independent, etc. But she wants a husband and a home and kids to take care of. I myself am at a loss as to how to advise her. I certainly acknowledge her feelings as legitimate, and indeed I felt exactly the same needs at an even younger age. I try to tell her to trust God to bring the right man to her at the right time, someone who will love her without doubt and without hesitation. It isn't easy to wait, but I don't see how she has any choice. [She did ask me what I thought about going to one of those Christian match-maker sites on the internet. I told her I'm not against the idea entirely, but I think it is too early for that.]
OK, these are the thoughts that are running in my idle mind today. I think I am going to click the "No comments allowed" button on this post, because I don't want anyone telling me how stupid this post is. I guess if anyone wants to say anything to me on this topic, they will need to find my email address.
Lord, I love you. I thank you for a good husband and a long, happy marriage. I thank you for three wonderful kids. I am a blessed woman. Lord, you've heard me ask this before, but I will ask it again: please bring each of my children into happy marriages. Bring them the right person at the right time, someone they will love and someone who will love them without doubt and without hesitation.
